Home News The Untold Story of Wood, the Well-Endowed Man

The Untold Story of Wood, the Well-Endowed Man

Well-Endowed Man
Well-Endowed Man

Wardy joubert iii For an article last week, I travelled down a rabbit hole of fake news texts about the COVID-19 pandemic, only to find a photo of a ripped Black man with a big penis. When I went looking for the well-endowed man to ask about his cult status during this crisis, I discovered he was a guy named Wood who had died years before.

Well-Endowed Man
Well-Endowed Man

People who had read the storey and wanted to know more about the mythical Wood sent emails, DMs, and memes. Most wanted to donate to Wood’s family. Like many of them, I was disappointed with the plot; it felt incomplete.

All I knew about this man was that he had died and had made a jerk-off video. It felt unjust to sum up a person’s life in two things. I’d hate to think that after I’m gone, people would only remember that I tripped on a cactus while intoxicated on Bud Light. So I set out to learn more about him beyond his enormous penis and meme fame, and I did. This is Wood’s undiscovered narrative, or Wardy Joubert III’s.

After days of searching and chasing dead ends, I got lucky. “The person in the photo prank,” said an email. Someone claimed to know Wood, alias Wardy. His real name, Facebook page, and girlfriend’s GoFundMe page were all posted. The GoFundMe comments were lovely and amusing, creating a picture of a big lug beloved by many. People agreed to keep unlawful bottles and beverage containers out of the Foundry, where he worked as a bouncer, in his honour. With this newfound knowledge, I was able to research Wardy and connect with his family.

Wardy Joubert III was born in San Francisco in 1971. Wardy met his stepmother, Karen Joubert, when she began dating his widower father (Wardy’s mother, Vera, died of Hodgkin’s disease when he was 11). Wardy received his nickname Wood from his stepmother while he was a kid playing baseball. After high school, he exploited his sturdy body and athletic aptitude to become a semi-pro football player, playing in arena football leagues.

“He’d say, ‘Pitbull, I wish to suit up one more time and play on that field.’ I don’t care if I lose my knees forever. “I just want to suit up one more time,” his ex-girlfriend Heather Alegria told me over the phone.

He was able to use his passion for football to help a kids outreach and training camp. Wardy was a deacon at St. Paul Tabernacle Baptist Church, always willing to pray for others, evangelise on the street, and assist his pastor in outreach efforts. His friends and relatives claim he was always willing to help those in need; his Herculean physique and kind nature made him a community pillar. (Many comments on social media posts complimented his smile, sense of humour, and friendliness.)

“He strolled down the street like the mayor,” Alegria added.

Wardy loved the San Francisco Giants, wore a G-string occasionally, and could perfectly imitate people’s voices. It wasn’t news to Alegria, or to Joubert, that naked photos of their beloved Wardy were flying around on the internet. The image has been circulating on 4chan and Reddit since 2012. They’d been troubled by that vision since Wardy’s death. They just didn’t recognise it was linked to coronavirus.

Heather learned about Wardy’s pornography job from a friend who visited their Bernal Heights apartment and saw a photo of the couple. When questioned if it was her boyfriend, Alegria said yes.

“‘That’s not your guy.’ It’s a meme.” Wardy dated Alegria for three years.

The acquaintance then showed Alegria the now-famous photo, the identical one used in the false coronavirus alerts, leaving her surprised but amused. “That’s how I found out about the photos and Wardy’s past lifestyle,” she stated. What about that big… endowment in the prank? He maintains his penis isn’t severely Photoshopped, despite proof to the contrary. “He was proud of that! “He’s it,” she said.

“After that shot, I learned a lot about Wardy. “It didn’t affect our connection,” Alegria remarked. “It made us more open and learn more about one other.” He discovered I wasn’t judgmental… He was never ashamed of me. “I didn’t want him in trouble.”

To cuckold the men, Wardy would go to sex clubs and parties in San Francisco. Someone approached Wardy about doing pornographic movies for extra income at one of these events. His house in Bernal Heights, which had been passed down from his grandparents to his mother, and which he planned to bequeath his two children eventually, was in risk, according to Alegria and his stepmom.

When Alegria confronted him, he confessed all—but she was understanding

More than anything, Alegria feared his family would find out about Wardy’s secret profession after the photo resurfaced in the meme community. Karen Joubert, though, knew.

“I had seen it years ago [when he was alive]. One of my pals sent it to me. She saw it and called me. ‘Oh my god, you’ve got to look at this,’ she exclaimed. I told him about it. We discussed it because we were close. “We talked every day,” Joubert said.

Wardy, 45, died of a heart attack on December 11, 2016. Surprisingly, Wardy, according to Alegria, was “as healthy as a horse,” drank just beer, and ate healthy. His heart had swelled and “blew up on him,” she said.

That wasn’t the only surprise that day. When she got home from the hospital, she grabbed Wardy’s phone to notify his friends and relatives. There were other women wishing him good morning and asking why he hadn’t responded back. In her memory, she had to call the women and inform them that he had died. “Two of them sobbed, saddened. That didn’t matter at this time, ma’am. One of them wanted to dispute about who was his true girlfriend.

She knew her guy had secrets. Then you’re your own journalist. I tried to find out more, but I already knew most of it. “I knew he did homosexual porn, attended to sex clubs, and saw other ladies when he pretended he was on work trips,” she said. The misdeeds didn’t matter anymore because she loved and accepted him anyway. He wasn’t perfect, but he was decent.

“I want people to know more about him than simply seeing this photo of his schlong hanging out,” Alegria remarked. That one snapshot may have been a small part of his life, but that man accomplished so much good.

Wardy’s family is worried because companies like Barstool Sports and comedian Tom Segura are selling clothes featuring his image. (Segura contacted Alegria because he plans to donate the shirt’s proceeds to Wardy’s family. To quote his publicist: “You’re just pummelling with terrible news and then you receive these texts that just break it all up…” I did it because I thought he deserved it. He made myself and my friends chuckle, and I doubt many people would profit from his image, especially after he died.”)

Wardy’s family has yet to pay for his funeral. “We had to pay for his extra huge coffin,” Alegria joked. They still owe around $1,500 for the memorial service and haven’t been able to afford a monument for his cemetery. Joubert calls any gift “a blessing.” To help with those fees, a new GoFundMe campaign been opened.

Seeing the images again was “embarrassing,” Joubert said. She and Alegria are worried about his kids receiving prank texts or memes. Last week, Joubert’s sister notified her of the photo’s comeback, and Wardy’s former pastor contacted her about the photos the day we met. Images on the internet cannot be contained, but Joubert, a fervent Christian, hopes so.

The fact that the’surprise’ is a huge naked Black man is part of the comedy, playing on stereotypes casting Black men as physical threats with outsized sexuality. Racist jokes about the size of Black men’s dicks are common in comedy, especially from white female comedians. In the midst of a worldwide health catastrophe, people are understandably latching to any opportunity for amusement, even if it means mocking a man who is now deceased. Both Joubert and Alegria said Wardy was a jokester with an excellent sense of humour.

“He wasn’t happy with how it was utilised then, but he was pleased of the shot,” Alegria said. It’s hard to say how he’d manage it now that he’s gone.

I had no idea how far into this man’s life this storey would take me. Part of me feels guilty for helping to make this prank SMS a bigger storey, adding to his family’s suffering. I found myself comforting them as they grieved, tormented, and joked about Wardy. The only way I could honour them all was to recount his and their stories. He had a complex and rich personality. These images and films may not have saved his family home, but they are an important part of his legacy.

Even still, Joubert wishes it were over. “I want it to be taken down and not spread.” I want a formal apology. Rest in peace. “He had no voice,” she claimed.

But Alegria says Wardy’s sexual videos have helped her relax. “I dragged them up!” I know I contributed to some of the hits on those pages when he initially went. “My boy,” she said. “It’s either sweet or odd.” “Call me odd, but I miss the man.”

UPDATE: The Joubert family finally laid Wardy’s headstone thanks to global fan support. Beloved father and son. Enjoy the view. Wardy’s stepmother, Karen Joubert, contacted me to thank everyone who donated. The family has used GoFundMe cash to continue Wardy’s philanthropic efforts in his hometown. Socks and gloves were also distributed on December 11th.

Wardy Joubert did play for the New Orleans Saints, as stated previously. Joubert, according to his stepmom and ex-wife, never played professionally. We apologise

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